Saturday, February 1, 2014

Boy Meets Girl by Joshua Harris

My own little notes

I've always wanted to read Joshua Harris's books from the first time I laid eyes on his book "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" almost ten years ago. It truly intrigued me, I wanted to hear this guys story and what he had to say. But alas, the years went by and I never got around to getting the book. But one day my sister dragged us all into Goodwill (clothes shopping, lol). They had a book section and while my eyes scanned the shelves of scattered book my eyes fell on the name Joshua H. (the rest covered with a sticker). I immediately picked it up and nearly squealed for joy! I'd found a Joshua Harris book and for only $1! It was God's little Christmas present to me that year. I couldn't wait to go home and start reading it, and so I did. 
Valentines is coming up soon and even though it's not a real holiday we all like to let those of whom we love know it (again) or maybe your thinking you wished you were in a relationship. Well then this is the book for you and all your friends. I've already shared this book with my friends who have shared it with some of their friends (and potential interests). Now without further ado, I quick overview of what the book is about and then my thoughts and opinions of it in my review. 


Purpose Driven Romance 

The last thing singles want is more rules. But if you’re looking for an intentional, God-pleasing game plan for finding a future spouse, Joshua Harris delivers an appealing one. A compelling new foreword, an all-new “8 Great Courtship Conversations” section, and updated material throughout makes this five-year revision of the original Boy Meets Girl a must-have! Harris illustrates how biblical courtship—a healthy, joyous alternative to recreational dating—worked for him and his wife. Boy Meets Girl presents an inspiring, practical example for readers wanting to pursue the possibility of marriage with someone they may be serious about. 

My Review

In Joshua's Harris's Boy Meets Girl I couldn't have found a better book explaining courtship and in such an inspiring way. Before you start reading chapter one there's a little courtship quiz on the back of the book. The very first question was: Is courting more holy than dating? Joshua answered: what matters most is not the terms we use, but that our lives glorify God. You must read chapter 2 for the full explanation, you will love it. Which he talks about the difference between dating for recreation and dating for a purpose. He explains and talks as if you were sitting right in front of him. Not pushing his thoughts on you what so ever, but making you think more deeply on the matter of relationships and what you truly want out of them. 

That's only one chapter, I'd love to go through every chapter with you all (maybe I will one day!). For instance, chapter 4 is one of my favorites. "Tell me how, tell me who, tell me when!" Showing through a story of a friend of his that even though we think we have all our ducks in a row, God may see a few ducks needing some rearranging. And that we need to be patient and follow according to God's timing. Patience is tough!

Joshua Harris even touches on other topics as the relationships progress. In chapter 9: True Love Doesn't Just Wait (How to be passionately in love and sexually pure). Sharing with the reader one of his own experiences with temptation with his fiance and the conversation he had with the Holy Spirit. 
"Who are you kidding? 
I shifted slightly, shut my eyes and tried to ignore the voice.
Your not fooling anyone, it said again. 
Still I didn't answer. Maybe he would go away. Give up. 
Shannon and I had gotten engaged two months earlier. We'd come to visit her mother, Mitzi, at her Ocean City beach house. It was a well deserved break from wedding planning and work. Didn't my conscience need a  break too? 
This is ridiculous Josh, he said again, undeterred. You know this is wrong.   
It had been my idea for Shannon and I to take an afternoon nap in the outdoor hammock. 
"I will not live my life by other people's standards," I told my conscience. "I feel at peace about doing this." 
(This is one of my absolute favorite parts.)
"If you feel such peace about it, why are you arguing with me?"

Hallelujah! I clapped by hands to Jesus for that one, Really, I did! Even though sitting in a hammock doesn't sound like a problem, God said otherwise. In being so close, that physical closeness, to his wife-to-be he was lusting after her but even though she was engaged to him she still was not yet his. I commended him for doing the right thing, it made me so proud. I hope when I have kids, sons I pray but for the girls too, they will grow up to listen to God and do the right thing, Especially when it comes to their relationships with the opposite sex. 

As I kept reading, I realized how much the courtship ways were already instilled upon my heart by God. Most of what Joshua talked about were things I had only, honestly, dreamed about. I didn't know that anyone did those things anymore or if it was something possible to do nowadays. He covered so many questions I hadn't thought about. Like how to:

  • Set a clear course for romance
  • Getting closer without compromising (like using your lips to communicate rather than kissing lol)
  • Finding a support system and community
  • Dealing with past sexual sins (of yours or your potential spouse)

I wished there was more to read! The more I read the more I became inspired. Each of his stories made me laugh and cry tears of joy and examine my heart. Though I've never been in a relationship, I know now when the time comes and God does bring that special man into my life, I want to do it right. Not Joshua Harris's way, or courtship vs. dating way, but God's way. A way that will glorify him and make him proud, which will ultimately make me happy and my relationship that much stronger.

Boy Meets Girl is about dating with a purpose and romance chaperoned by wisdom given by God and through his word. So pick up this book and listen to the guy who "kissed dating goodbye" and say hello to courtship!

I'd appreciate it so much if you would rate my review! Don't worry, putting in your email will not invite more emails from this site, it's only used to verify that your not a robot ;) And feel free to leave a comment if you wish as well! :D

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